I had the strangest dream the other night. I woke up only remembering parts of it and hazy remnants of events surrounding those moments. I hate not being able to remember dreams. Continue reading →
You know what is not fun? Getting all dressed up for a date and instead you realise you are out to dinner with a bad… bad joke. After several dates and consecutive eye rolls I feel it is my duty to help the general public with some (hopefully) helpful advice. Who am I kidding; this is just a list of things that make me wish every restaurant had an ejector seat button. Continue reading →
Why do men always want the ones they can’t have? Why do we only want the ones who don’t know we are alive?
There are days that I am sure the universe is having a laugh at my expense. I know I usually pick on people I like so I am going to assume the same goes for the universe. In which case I will have to ask for my own safety, Universe, could you like me a little less please?
You are killing me.
Whenever someone tells me they’re going on holidays, I start mentally packing my bags for our trip.
While they enthusiastically run through their itinerary, I imagine what I will be wearing during their hike, tour or show.
A couple of weeks ago I was catching up with a friend. He was telling me about his upcoming trip to the UK and all I could think about was Mr Darcy diving into the pond at Pemberley. I know he mentioned something about travelling to Germany but frankly at the time I was too busy having a cucumber sandwich with the Queen. Continue reading →
She said: Thank you for ….Tindering me. Is that a thing?
He said: Well I guess it is now….
You know that one friend who is always trying to fix your life? I have in my life time collected several smothering friends and of course there is my mother. They love me so much I am afraid they might kill me. Continue reading →